If you were pushed to describe your beliefs, what would you say? How would you describe yourself? Agnostic… Atheist… Gnostic… Philosopher… Buddhist… Muslim… Hindu… Sikh… or that vague cover-all for most Westerners, Christian? Not to forget Judean… Mormon… Seventh Day Adventist… nor the seven thousand various other flavours one might hear of in San Francisco.

Strange question, especially with me not declaring any allegiance to any fixed dogma, even moreso that the question just came off my fingers, and isn’t even the focus of this post. Maybe I write more on this later, or whenever.

Even so… due to my upbringing in a Church-oriented family, for which I am grateful, there’s a large volume of teaching locked inside. That teaching often rises to the surface in times of concern, or when my emotions cause me to feel concern, rightly or wrongly, especially in relationship matters.

Shadow, my K9 buddy, is a wonderful therapist. Living alone, after a near-lifetime of being one of a pair in one way or other, isn’t easy if one is wrapped up in efforts to escape a self-inflicted black hole.

Even harder when there’s a four-legged companion with needs to be catered for as well. Time flies, and priorities become distorted, bringing focus to the task in hand, rather than personal or doggy needs.

No… this post isn’t a “feel bad for Ken” plea. It’s not about dogs either, nor the merits, benefits, or restrictions, in having a dog. Maybe I write more on that later, or whenever, as well.

And, No… I’ve not flipped. There really is a point to this. It’s just that I often mention Shadow and the things that come into my mind when we’re out walking. This is another of those “revelations” from dog-walking.

The weekend of May 03rd, 2009, Myrna was away for a family wedding in Manila which the President of Philippines Republic would be attending, and Myrn hoped to meet her. Philippines were hit by three typhoons over that weekend.

Later, Myrn told me that she, with Mimi, her youngest daughter, was stranded for more than a day when a road became washed out and impassible. For safety sake the wedding trip was aborted and they returned home as soon as possible.

Communication is poor at the best of times and, on that occasion, a full week passed with absolutely no communication from Myrna… I was unaware of the typhoon situation. When you consider that, even now, we’ve still only had 3 chat sessions from April 29 through May 14, you might understand my concern.

My reaction was bad, and Myrn was left in no doubt of the fact. On the other hand, my relief and gratitude for the safe return of Myrn and Mimi goes without saying. What also should leave no doubt in the mind of the reader is how bad I felt for the way I reacted… after the facts of the matter became known.

Hence, the second half of the title of this post and the reason for writing it.

Myrna also felt bad and apologised for leaving me in the dark, and that covers the leading half of the title. Not so much for atonement by one moreso than the other, but simply for atonement between us.

It was after the dust had settled from our little upset when a walk with Shadow brought the term “atonement” to mind and, with it, another glimpse of self-realisation. Ingrained Church teaching caused me to think of “atonement for my sins”, which, in a way, I suppose it was. Being more of a “free-thinker” I found the following definitions.

You will see that the first definition comes from an English test, presumably from the days when Religion was being taught in schools. For me, the second definition is more to the point, especially in our personal case.

Definition of atone (verb)
forms: atoned; atoned; atoning
turn away from sin or do penitence
http://www.english-test.net/gre/vocabulary/words/088/gre-definitions.php#atone

Atonement \A*tone”ment\, n.
1. (Literally, a setting at one.) Reconciliation; restoration of friendly relations; agreement; concord. [Archaic]
http://www.hydroponicsearch.com/spelling/simplesearch/query_term-atonement/database-!/strategy-exact

Similar circumstances of concern, and doggy-induced thoughts, occurred in late February, and that was covered by the Pascal quote in my previous post.

Conducting a relationship, or trying to, on a trans-global scale, has more than a few challenges. Frustrations are equal for both parties, but response, reaction, and even perception are a matter for the individual.

There again is where the self-realisation kicks in. I’m grateful for that and, along with the following Bible entry I remember an old saying that’s also appropriate… “Too soon old… too late smart”. I’m also grateful that the smarts came before I became TOO old.

“Don’t judge, and then you won’t be judged. For others will treat you as you treat them. And why worry about a speck in the eye of your brother when you have a board in your own? Should you say, ‘Friend, let me help you get out that speck from your eye,’ when you can’t even see because of the board in your own? Hypocrite! First get rid of the board. Then you can see to help your brother.”
Matthew 7: 1-5

Be gentle and ready to forgive; never hold grudges. Remember the Lord forgave you, you must forgive others.
Colossian 4: 13

The Martian in me reveals and, thankfully, the Venusian in Myrna is forgiving. We are each understanding of the other, and Myrn’s Yin supports my own Yin in helping to balance my Yang. I say “Bring on the Yin”. What say you?

The Bible quotes go to show how deep the learning goes… or does it rather show how willing we are to accept the teaching? Or maybe it supports the Aristotle quote from my previous post, “You can never learn anything that you did not already know”?

Answers on a postcard take too long. Just leave a comment, if you please.

Namaste… Have a Great Day.

KenW